Probably some background is needed before I type out a novel on the awesome visit we just had from Grandpa Jim. Even before Max was born - I considered myself pretty lucky, in that I married into a family that welcomed me with open arms from the first time I met them. I was nervous as could be about meeting Rob's parents but we've always had a great relationship (which isn't easy considering they both live on the west coast). Grandpa Jim and Grandma Sugar are in Oregon and Mema and Pops are in Arizona! No matter where they are though - suffice it to say we are really thankful for families who love us.
However in the nine months of pregnancy...I had read one to many horror stories on blog boards, baby center, parent magazines etc. etc. that said "oh my in-laws were great....until we had kids". It left me a little leary about how our respective relationships might change once our baby boy was born. I've come to believe that, of course there will be some increased natural tension once baby arrives and the dynamic of family shifts (read- I go crazy because of lack of sleep and my over emotional state and possibly my inability to communicate what I really need sometimes). But, I know Rob and I both believe that one of the best things we can give Max is a great relationship with both sides of our families.
Reflecting on that idea a little more - I think sometimes tension can rise because of fear. Fear that grandparents who aren't physically here as much be cut out of their grandchildren's lives. I never fully understood this until Max arrived and thought how terrible it would be if his significant other didnt like me or worse, want me around. Let’s be honest: as wife I have a lot of influence over Rob and this in turn extends to Max. The more I thought about it - the more I want ALL grandparents to know how much we value them and want them to have a place in Max's life.
I guess I feel the need to put this all out there because - we had both of Rob's parents visit this summer! Mema and Pops came out for several weekends in August - they got their fill of Max snuggles, love, and abundant smiles. They were even able to stand with us as we baptized Max and exchanged wedding vows in the Catholic church. Then, this past week/weekend Grandpa Jim was in from Oregon!
(And I have a sneaky suspicion he got my hint about the need for more Oregon gear. He
brought jerseys, onesies, and even t-shirts! Grandma Sugar also picked up some cute things from
Old Navy and this epic elephant hat)
(What? Your Grandpa doesn't bring you computers? Too bad for you Max says...or
he would say, if he weren't too busy catching up on his correspondence).
Being the planner that you know I am - I had SO many things I wanted to do while Grandpa Jim was here - pumpkin farms, hikes in the park, visiting the playground, getting frozen yogurt, attending the car show, and the perhaps biggest feather in my fictitious cap - scoring tickets to the President's Cup. Well...I should have known better! First, Max was getting over an ear infection and finishing up his ten days on amoxicillin...which led to filling up about 10-12 dirty diapers A DAY between Friday and Sunday! You can imagine what fun that was (read - extra loads of laundry, hosing down the car seats, and making bathroom trips at nearly every restaurant we ate at). Then....the rain came. And not just a sprinkle...but monsoons sheeted down starting Friday afternoon...when Rob and and Jim were at the green farthest from the club house. Needless to say - they arrived home soaking wet.
(But hey! Here they are pre-soaking...all smiles!)
Even though the rain cancelled out dampened some of my plans...we did manage to make it out to Costco on Saturday, two plant nurseries (for pumpkins), the grocery store, and several nice dinners.
(Pumpkin Patchin with Macho Max)
Sometimes I just need to remember - it's not all about the grandious plans or visions I have in my head...mostly grandparents just want to hang out with Max (I mean really, who can blame them). It doesn't matter if it's in a field of pumpkins or at our house. You better believe Grandpa Jim got in some snuggle time!
So, unless any grandparents want to relocate to Columbus (and believe me, we would for sure encourage this) - we will always be at least an hour from each of you. I know this has been a source of heartache for us, and I'm sure you've spent some time thinking about it to. We don't know exactly what the future will hold - but we do know that we will do whatever it takes to make sure no set of grandparents is left out of Max's life. But, it's not just Max we are worried about. We need you in our lives, as well. Just because we're all grown up, doesn't mean we don't still need you as role models and wise counsel. I love knowing that we have three sets of grandparents to go to when we need advice, helping hand, or just some time with family. Most of all, there is nothing more important to me than that you love Max so completely. It's truly a gift to my heart.
XoXo
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