I wouldn't say that I have to travel a lot for my job...but once a year the opportunity presents itself that I get to attend a preschool education conference. The conference is Wednesday to Friday, but we like to go for a full week and try to meet with other educators at the local Zoo. Usually, the conference is in November - but at that point Max was only 6 months old and I just couldn't fathom leaving him (or Papa Rob) for a week --so I convinced my colleagues to try a new conference in January. In Chicago (what was I thinking??).
In my mind - it would be so much easier to leave at that point because Max would be almost nine months old. As it got closer and closer to the departure date - my heart grew more heavy with emotions. How could I leave? Would Papa Rob be okay? Would Max forget me? Would my house be a total disaster when I got home? Literally the Friday before I was supposed to be leaving, I felt ill all day long. The one important thing that got me through planning, packing, and eventually having to actually leave was to remind myself that Max and Rob would find new and fun ways to connect and function while I was gone. And, that would be totally okay.
(the sunday before I left we had family dinner at Fazolis
with Auntie Stacy...it was perfect!)
Because I know at some point I will have to travel again - I wanted to write this post so I could recall what works (and thus, minimize the drama in my own mind).
1.) Have my awesome father in-law send me a pep talk via text message. It should come as no surprise that not only is Papa Rob amazing, so is his dad, Grandpa Jim! When I woke up on Monday morning (at 4:15 AM) - I had the most wonderful text message from Grandpa Jim. He reminded me that not only would everything be fine at home - but it was good for me professionally to be able to attend these conferences. I would be resume building and networking and ultimately taking care of my career. It was just what I needed to read in the wee hours of the morning and really propelled me out the door with a sense of calm.
2.) Facetime is awesome. Right now - Max is at a great age where he responds to my face on the screen but doesn't get upset. I could see if your child was a little bit older that it might send them into a melt down. But, for now - this was great! I could see his sweet cheeks, smiles, and laughs every night and if only for a moment feel like I was part of it all.
(love laughing with them in the evening!)
3.) Make it real through pictures and videos. Everyone was so amazing about sending me pictures all week long. From our babysitter, to Rob, to my parents - I got to see lots of what Max was up to. I knew he was having a blast...playing in snow, eating yogurt melts, using his sippy cup, even taking selfies! I say - keep those pictures coming!
(Max rocking it out at music class with Daddy)
(Papa Rob sent this picture of Max's first "drawing" displayed proudly on the fridge)
4.) Have the grandparents come for the day (if possible). Grandmim and Grandpa Tim offered to come up and have homeschool for a couple days - but ultimately they were just needed one day. During this day - I got lots of pictures! And, a true play by play of what they were up to (turns out Max was up to filling up his diaper quite a bit...ahem.) But, they also managed to unload the dishwasher, clean bottles, do a load of Max's laundry, and make dinner before leaving. No complaints here!
5.) Get an awesome roommate. My roommate for the trip was my co-worker Kat. She was so great about gently reminding me that everything was going to be fine. She never judged when I would sneak off to Facetime with Rob and Max. She also let me watch all my shows and was totally cool with going to bed early (I mean, if I'm going to be away from my family - I may as well be getting a full 10 hours of sleep!). Bonus, she also has lots of family in Chicago, so we wined and dined at all the finest locals.
(living it up in the swanky hotel room!)
6.) Make the most of the trip. Not going to lie - dressing up, eating out, gettting a full nights sleep, visiting amazing Zoos in Chicago - it was all fabulous. If I have to be away - I might as well try to make the most of it (and try not to feel guilty).
(We visited Brookfield Zoo and Shedd Aquarium!)
(deep dish pizza - sooooo good!)
7.) Be a really great parenting partner. Before leaving, Papa Rob and I touched base about everything. I made sure there were lots of freezer meal options, and packed refrigerator. I pre-paid for the babysitting and brought all the week's necessities on Friday (so he wouldn't have to remember it on Monday). I laid out all of Max's outfits. I forwarded him all important numbers and emails. Basically, I wanted to make it as easy as possible to be a single parent for the week. And, I told him - if he needed the weekend to recover, it was totally cool. Heck, I even offered to book him a massage! And, on the flip side - he kept me looped into everything that was going on here and any changes to Max's schedule - which I really appreciated.
(love these two!)
My job will probably always require a tiny bit of travel. The more prep work I do, the more honestly and equitably we handle our changing roles, the better it goes for everyone. We’ve also organized our village to ensure we can ask for more help when my travel happens, so thinking ahead has also been important. Needless to say - we all made through! And I'm super happy to be home :)
(while I did sneak in for some snuggles on Friday evening...
our real reunion was bright and early on Saturday morning!)
XoxO
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